You choose your friends not your family. You may not like your Auntie Jeetu, but deal with it.   If you think she’s annoying, consider it a defect, like an extra hand coming out of your elbow.  She’s here to stay.

Your friends, however, are another entity.  Some people fade away. Some remain at a distance.  Some people you will never understand.

But if you share your feelings with someone regularly, chances are you have some kind of bond with them.    And be thankful for it.

You can have a lot of things in this world, but having a good friend or two is the kind of wealth that would make a calculator explode.

Believe it baby.

by Ken LeClair

Do we create our own heaven or our own hell here on earth by our actions? Do we by our own deeds bestow evil or goodness upon others and in return on ourselves? If we are kind and generous will our lives reflect this quality, or if we are mean and selfish will our lives take a different course? The belief in karma was well established in India before the advent of Buddhism which carried the idea of karma to deeper meanings.

The basic tenants of karma is that what goes around comes around. If you are an honest, genuinely good person your life will reflect the positive aspects of these qualities. Though others may rob you and malign you, there is no lasting harm as you are complete on the inside and those who know you best will be there for you. If on the other hand you choose to be a thief and a maligner, those who know you best will know what and who you are.

Bernard Madoff had his riches and now he has his reward; meanwhile, those he robbed still have their freedom and their good names. But what about the little guy who leads an honest life and is faithful to his wife and raised his children to be good to their fellow man? Do you think he will fare better than the big shot who did whatever it took to climb to the top and acquire the millions at any cost?

by Ken LeClair

There are 60,000 Indian physicians practicing medicine in the United Kingdom, Australia, Canada and the United States with the majority of them (35,000) practicing in the United States. This is equivalent to ten percent of all physicians currently practicing medicine in India today and the largest émigré physician workforce in the world.

India today is a complex and staggering nation of 1,200,000,000 people, occupying 2.4% of the world’s land mass with 15% of the world’s population; 960,000,000 Hindus, 120,000,000 Muslims and 100,000,000 Christians, Sikhs, Jains, Buddhists and Parsis speaking 22 officially recognized languages  plus English as a common denominator for communication. Indian medical emigration has brought enormous benefits to the host countries while depleting India itself of their services . Though most who do emigrate do so for the opportunities afforded them both financially and career wise and many do return to India with greatly expanded expertise in their fields of practice. To say that the reasons for emigration are complex is to understate the issue, as such a varied nation has many issues that propel this brain drain.

One thing is certain and that is that given the opportunity, tens of thousands of physicians from throughout the developing world choose to go where they will earn the highest standard of living for themselves and their families. This is human nature taking it’s natural course, and just as water seeks it’s own level, highly educated professionals will quite often choose to go where the money is. Fortunately for the Indian People, 600,000 physicians chose to stay in India despite the lure of emigration.

by Ken LeClair

Nikki Haley, the daughter of Punjab Sikhs, is poised to become the Republican candidate for Governor of South Carolina. Being called a rag head by an opponent didn’t hurt her in this good old boy state and may very well have helped her. As a child she and her sister were denied entry into a beauty contest as they didn’t fit into the white or the black category of separate contests. But oh how the new south has changed! South Carolina like it’s sister Louisiana knows a good deal when it sees one.

The primary will be held June 22nd and if she wins, she is the odds on favorite, she will be a shoo in to beat the Democratic candidate State Senator Vincent Sheheen in this heavily Republican state. Mitt Romney will be appearing with her this week and Sarah Palin is expected to endorse her as well. Let’s see who makes the national ticket first Bobby Jindal or Nikki Haley.

So we went to an Indian wedding, and as Certified Indian Wedding Reviewers, were appalled at one startling development.

There’s no &$#@ing meat to eat.  Are you serious?  I schlepped an hour on the highway to get here and you’re not even gonna give me some &$#@ing shrimp?  Give a break.

I don’t care what you reason is.  Whether you are an animal lover or a health freak or you worship plants, it’s not about you.   You  need to feed the people.  And I mean good, filling, hearty chicken or seafood.

Newsflash: Bell peppers is not an entree.  Neither are freakin tomatoes.

Being proactive, we jumped into car and found a chicken joint not even a mile away from the wedding.   Sometimes, you just have to take matters into your own hands.

submitted by an outside contributor for desiexclusives.com

For many Desis in their late 20’s, marriage is inevitable and to some, absolutely necessary.  Women especially are likely to panic, due to the belief if they have children in their later 30’s; there is a greater chance of a birth defect.  Parents and relatives don’t help the situation, through their constant questions and match-making that they often due secretly.  I understand that parents are concerned that their child won’t find their significant other and live alone, but is it really the end of the world if it takes them longer than their niece, who was a good Desi girl who got married at 26 and is pregnant at 29?

Young Desis are brainwashed themselves with this ridiculous mentality that they must get married in their late 20’s.  Many of our Desi friends get married in their 20’s, and we often compare ourselves to them.  For many, it doesn’t matter if they found Mr. or Ms. Right; it’s about having the status of being a married individual.  Honestly, I find it quite amusing and ridiculous.  It’s almost as if we aren’t married at 28, we’ve failed at life, and might as well slit our wrists and end it all.  Marriage is the only way for us to succeed in life and be happy.  In my opinion, that is biggest crock of $%&@ I have ever heard.

Many of our parents were brought together through arranged marriages.  In India, arranged marriages are common, and especially decades ago when our parents got married, it was extremely common.  I understand that our parents carry that mentality of getting married at a certain age back to America, but I find it sad that many young Desis that were born and raised in America, have that same mentality.  Why is marriage so important to certain people, if they haven’t even found love?  Isn’t that what the foundation of a marriage should be based on?  I assume to some Desis, the idea of having a lavish 3 day Indian wedding and living in a nice house in the suburbs and having kids is what life is about, even if true love among the married couple ceases to exist.  Secretly, the couple may not be happy, but it doesn’t matter because they are living the stereotypical life they are supposed to live.  God forbid, if they were in their mid 30’s and still going to Indian conventions trying to find their soul mate.  What type of life is that?  The wife and husband may not truly love each other, but at least their parents can enjoy their grandchildren.  More than likely they are financially comfortable, so what else do they need?  I’ll tell you what they need.  They need a clue on how to live life to the fullest, cause in that regard, they are absolutely clueless.

In India, the movie stars of Bollywood are the Gods. In America, the stars of Hollywood are God. Its not to say that in America that Indians don’t watch Indian movies because that isn’t true. Its that the media here is so focused on Hollywood that Bollywood is microscopical to it.  Actually in America there’s a huge fan base of Indians and Americans consistently watching Indian films of Bollywood. It is growing even more.  The Brad Pitts and Tom Cruises should have a film together with the Shahrukh Khan and Hrithik Roshan.  With India’s dance moves and songs and America’s acting and narrative it would be the film of the century.  If these worlds emerge, interesting things can happen.

written by an outside contributor for desiexclusives.com

When I picture my ideal wedding, I envision a setting that is exotic and tropical.  I would love to have a wedding on a beach in the Caribbean or Mexico with my closest friends and family.  The last thing that I envision is having a wedding at a typical Indian banquet hall such as Akbar in Jersey.  A destination wedding is a great idea not only because it is a nice vacation for everyone that attends, but also a way to weed out certain people that you aren’t very close to, but felt obligated to invite out of courtesy.  I would prefer an intimate wedding with my closest friends and family that will make the trip no matter what it cost in order to share my special day with me.

Indian weddings are huge and very hectic.  In India, weddings that consist of 1500 people are not uncommon at all.  In America, Indian weddings usually don’t get to be that massive, but a count of 300-500 people is quite average.  Usually the guest list consists of aunts, uncles, friends (close and casual), your parent’s friends, your parent’s coworkers, and other miscellaneous people that your parents felt they had to invite out of courtesy.  Out of all those people that come to your wedding, there really are a small percentage of people that you really appreciate sharing your special moment with.  I understand that my parents would want to invite their close friends, but for a wedding, they feel obligated to invite everyone in their phonebook.  They might fear that if this one friend is invited and tells another friend they are going to the wedding, that uninvited friend will be upset.  There are a lot of politics involved with creating a guest list.  I was even told to invite few of my close friends for my sister’s wedding; despite the fact my sister didn’t know them well.  Honestly, is that really necessary?  More heads equates to more money, but that really isn’t the reason I don’t want so many people at my wedding.  After my sister’s wedding, many of my parent’s friends would go up to her and comment on how they enjoyed the wedding.  My sister would play it off and show her appreciation, but in many cases, she had no idea that person was even at the wedding.  I don’t want that.  I want an intimate setting where I can speak and mingle with everyone.  I want to remember that you were at my wedding and that we enjoyed it together.

We all know how hectic Indian weddings can become.  The wedding usually consists of many different functions that span around 3 days.  The more people that are around, the more hectic it will be.  It is not uncommon for the family of the bride and groom break down due to stress.  My mother broke down in tears before my sister’s wedding due to the inordinate amount of stress that came with it.  The last thing I want is for my family to feel overwhelmed.  As much of a special occasion a wedding would be for me, it is even more special to my family.  I want them to appreciate and enjoy every second of it, without a worry in the world.  For many Indian couples, weddings are happy occasions, but very stressful to a point where they are so relieved it’s over, almost as if they were taking a final exam.  I don’t want that feeling.  I want to enjoy my wedding to a point where I can envision myself doing it all over again and enjoying it as much as the first time.

May 22nd at Vermillion- 480 Lexington Ave (between 46 & 47ths) in New York City @ 11 pm, no cover charge but RSVP reservation recommended.  Ages 23 and over, 2 bottles ($500) Grey Goose or Black Label.  Table reservations 917-548-9699.

Obviously this is not for the teenie bopper crowd or mom and pop. College educated Desi singles and couples who want to mingle with the in crowd of New York Desi society will feel right at home at this event. Those familiar with previous events organized by Nemesh Bhattle will recognize that this will be a night to remember as the summer of 2010 kicks off in high fashion.

DesiExclusives.com is not affiliated with Elite 8 Events, which is a separate organization.

Last night, Rima Fakih was crowned Miss USA in Las Vegas.

She admits she is somewhat concerned with the reaction of fellow Muslims to her competing in a beauty pageant; meanwhile TMZ has released photos of her in a stripping contest in Detroit back in 2007.

Should her crown be revoked for stripping?  I don’t think so.  The photos of her stripping have been online for three years- she cannot be blamed if no one has noticed them until today.

All in all, the 24 year old Lebanese girl went home a big winner last night.